For years I have been swimming in the black goth pool trying to find myself and feel comfortable with who I am and what I want; what I want to surround myself with, what I want to listen to and be a part of, etc etc...
Yet (ironically) with the richness of the subculture in Berlin I found that I have drained it for myself and am now yearning for something new - something different that will make me feel individual and unique, without necessarily closing myself in a black velvet box and putting a sticker that says "goth" on it.
I have been enjoying it for a long time, but it is time to go forward.
I personally think that this change occurred because of 2 things:
- Boris and I got into the queer scene.
- Making music together has made me realize that playing it live will include little to no goth-related events/ crowd.
So here are some things where I feel a part of, that are not gothically inclined.
These things include bands, scenes, clothes and everything else which constructs one´s environment.
Garage, Indie, Grunge, Noiserock
And generally noisy lo-fi guitar music that can easily be dark or light. I am sick of darkwave, modern witch house and similar, I want to kill the people that make it. Needless to say that there is so much to guitar music than post punk, which in its broad interpretations can be as monotone and boring or as avant-garde as you would like it to be (or to make!).
The Queer Community
I found that in so many queer bars and parties Boris and I could be ourselves without being started at, without feeling threatened, while being surrounded by nice people who would be labeled outsiders by everyone else. The events we love to go to feature 80s, post punk and wave music and it´s simply a delight. Sometimes a bit of pop and a Drag Show can lift your spirits up as well. It´s a nice way to meet like-minded people outside of your usual goth circle, and to be welcome as you are.
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Mainstream Fashion
How can you feel special when you are dressed like everybody else? By taking bits and pieces of styles, toning them down and combining them with mainstream clothes. Why? Because less is more, and you know you are unique enough on the inside. Also, as my teenage self once told me- dress in a way that people will not know what music you listen to.
pictures found on Pinterest
Do you have inspiring things outside the goth spectrum?
Maria
I'm not Goth coz I only enjoy the aesthetics (Ok and horror movies) part of it so not labelling myself Goth allows me to enjoy girly stuff like Hello Kitty, listen to pop rock, look "kawaii", be a childlike hugaholic (LOL)and so and so...
ReplyDeleteIt´s fun to combine different styles, I just see people stuck in this goth box and it makes me wonder if there´s anything else out there...
DeleteGreat post and thank you for your insight. I think evolving is wonderful, I think finding joy outside of a "scene" is wonderful. I love Tiki/Polynesian Pop/etc. I dress in colorful muumuu dresses, sip on Tiki drinks and hang out with people who love the same thing and could care less if my husband and I are 'goth'. We hang out in the indie scene, Derek goes to Viking Metal shows and we both like to go to drag shows and other perform art. Though goth music is our love and passion, it doesn't completely define us...and I love it. <3
ReplyDeleteThanks, I am happy you liked it and thanks for sharing!
DeleteOnce I've read somewhere that queer bars are where they play the best music and when I see the events you attend to on FB it seems like it was a true statement XD
ReplyDeleteAs for your question... it's hard for me to answer, because the more I think about it, the more it seems like the only thing linking me to the goth scene is my preferred music (and even this is doubtful, because it looks like I'm more into synthpop and new wave... I mean, the cheesier synthesisers, the better). Do I have ANY gothic interests? I don't know - and honestly, never cared about it. I just do what I like; if it happens to fall under the goth umbrella term, good. If not - it's good as well, because I'm so not going to change my ways because it's outside umbrella created by someone who wasn't me.
But anyway - 'goth' is a comfortable label for me and I'll continue to call myself one, because I love how versatile this subculture is. There is a place for so many different outlooks and passions, and since I'm drawn to things decadent, sinister and old-fashioned, what drawer would be more comfortable for me? It's not like I go telling everybody 'hey, I'm a goth', either. People that surround me have no idea what I listen to or what interests me - for them I'm just 'this weirdo who always wears black' and they all probably think I'm a metalhead. And I don't give a damn, even if I don't like metal at all.
Funny that for me goth being versatile means it´s actually not that versatile at all. I don´t know how to describe it, it´s like whenever it´s versatile enough, you still meet the same ideas, same aesthetic, only to be a variation of a thing done before. Maybe I am wrong, but this bores me. I think that a lot of people feel comfortable in the goth scene because for the most part they can relate to it, and frankly me too, but I am personally into so many different things that I want to constantly alter the term "goth" for myself, and end up criticizing it to the bone and ruin everyone´s day XD
DeleteYeah there's a whole world out there, and with so many people micromanaging what is and isn't goth, nothing wrong with deprogramming and seeing things anew and trying new things.
ReplyDeleteI seem to have developed a part time job out of criticizing everything goth related haha
DeleteAbsolutely!! Beside gothic rock, I listen to all kinds of metal, neo classical music, indie and so on... I dress like anybody else but in black. I put myself in the goth box, because thats were I'm most at home.
ReplyDeleteI agree, it is important to be where we are comfortable :)
DeleteIt is healthy to find outside interests outside of being goth. For me personally, I consider myself geeky because of my outside interests. There is nothing wrong with that. Good for you!
ReplyDeleteThat´s cool, not to mention there is a big subculture that falls under the category you mention. Sometimes I think that all those themed conventions are so much fun I wish I could attend one.
DeleteI do like goth, but it's just an aspect of myself. Who said we can't be part of many cultures and social groups at the same time? Here are some other aspects of me:
ReplyDelete1. I study Cultural and Pastoral theology
2. I enjoy greek entechno (art) music
http://www.girlsaskguys.com/social-relationships/a25226-greek-entekhno-art-music
3. I also listen to english classic and alternative rock, greek rock, rock 'n' roll and rockabilly.
3. I do mix current fashion styles with gothic, retro and rothabilly. I usually go for an elegant look, so no ripped jeans, baggy clothes or neon anything.
cool, thanks for sharing! Greek post punk is amazing, have to dig more into their rock music :)
DeleteLovely and insightful post, I enjoyed reading it. ^_^ Do not know about Berlin but I've noticed that in Finland the queer scene in most cities is quite alternative in their taste of music and fashion. :) How about in your hometown?
ReplyDeleteI am happy you´ve liked it!
DeleteIn my hometown, as well as in Israel entirely, there´s no queer scene at all. Maybe with the exception of Tel Aviv, but from what I´ve heard there´s not much...