The Darkling Tag

I haven't been around here in a while. I wanted to write more personal stuff and there were many things holding me back. Wanting to go back to the classic emo-blogging suddenly looks like a heavy emotional burden.
Natalie tagged me in this one so I thought - here's a fun way to start blogging again. Questions provided by Graveyard Kittens.

I tag Ra and The Mutant Stomp Friends.


1. What is your favourite candle scent? 
Don't have one. I'm an incense person.

2. Do you have a favourite book?
My all time favorite book is The Shadow of the Wind by Calos Ruiz Zafon. Very goth, very coming of age, very Barcelona *starts crying*.

3. Are you a tea or coffee person?
At work - coffee. At home - tea.

4. What is your favourite perfume/cologne?
The one Boris' mom gave me (aka the free perfume).

5. Do you have a celebrity crush?
Harry Treadaway, Ariana Grande and the one and only - Eva Green.

6. If you could change your name to a stereotypical 90s/2000s gothy name, what would it be?
I would rather not come back to that, thanks.

7. What are your top three tips for surviving hot weather while black clad?
Install air conditioning (ehm Germany!)

8. What song always makes you happy (doesn't have to be a goth band?)
Get this israeli gem - a new wave, yiddish inspired reggae song by the israeli singer songwriter Ehud Banai. It's called Yiddishe Rastaman. Give it a listen, it's priceless.

9. Are you active in the arts (eg. Play an instrument, paint, write, etc)?
Played classical music in the past, now I'm still looking to join a band as a singer.

10. What is your number one non-gothy hobby? 
Listening to non-gothy music.

Thought Provokers:

If you could be a supernatural creature, what would it be and why?
I'll be boring - a vampire. I want to see how humanity changes over time.

What horror monster-bases super power would you have?
Ugh - drinking blood I guess?

Do you feel confident or comfortable interacting with other Goths or gothy people (online or irl)? Why or why not? 
It really depends on what you interact with these people about. When it comes to music - I feel highly uncomfortable because you get judged on your tastes to no end, even from the people you least expect it.
I love interacting with irl goths about online goths and vice versa lol.

Is there something you wish there was more of in your subculture?
More post punk, less minimal synth. Don't let me get fucking starting on the lack of guitar music and presence of mediocre and repetitive electronic music!
Being open minded about other people's taste in music would also be a good start.

Care to share an embarrassing story related to your "darkliness"?
Being such a late bloomer when it comes to style. That was pretty fucking embarrassing. I do not regret it though.

How are you at DIY?
I can pull of the basic clothes and jewelry diy.


Confessional (aka True or False):

I love watching cheese romance films.
False. I usually can't stand them. I love watching cheesy fantasy movies though hehe.

I ALWAYS remember to wash off my makeup at night.
YES and YES! Sleeping with your makeup is the worst thing you can do to your face. Don't do it.

I sleep with plushies.
You bet - I have a hedgehog, a cat and furry goat plushie. And you'll flip when you'll see our armadillo plushie! Boris and I loved toys in bed.

I wear non-black pyjamas most nights.
False. I sleep naked, or with a black tank top.

I think Andrew Eldrich is overrated.
Yup. I don't need to tell you how much I hate him and his Sisters of Mercy band.

I don't like vampires.
False.

I don't like clubs.
False.

I don't enjoy graveyards. 
I do, but I would never make a gothy photoshoot in one, out of respect.

Blood makes me queasy.
Not always - if I know how to stop it and the source of it, I'm usually ok with it. I still don't enjoy looking at it and the thought of blood connecting to physical pain is what terrifies me most.

I'd sooner faint than pet a spider.
Nah, they're ok.

I don't like haunted houses.
False - yet I am too scared to go into them most of the time.

I've never read Dracula.
lol true. So embarrassed...

I think "Bela Lugosi's Dead" is a long and boring song.
Fucking false! Only one of the best example of post punk combined with dub.

Maria

90s Grunge Goth Inspiration - Betsey Johnson Autumn Winter 1997/8

I was browsing Pinterest the other day for some 90s goth style inspirations and stumbled across the following number. Spring is just around the corner here in Berlin and I feel like it's time to wear thinner stockings and shorter sleeves.

I have generally been in a very romantic goth style phase - I wear lots of long black skirts and tight black long sleeved shirts with lots of jewelry. It's a very comfy style to wear and leaves room for thick thermo leggings and winter socks. Yet those go to the back of the close now and I want to pretty much wear the same thing but with tank tops.

All images found on firstVIEW.

Autumn Winter 1997

Betsey Johnson has always been off the wall. She's kind of like the American Vivienne Westwood, only tackier... 

I love how the above are so street wear. It really brings you back to the classic 90s goth look. Very medieval inspired, long silhouettes, straight hair, HUGE crosses...

Makeup wise, I have been rocking this for over a year now.

If a goth would wear it, it's not exactly reinventing the wheel, but when I think about it, you don't see goths dressing this way today either. Maybe you have this in a grungier version, or throw a shrug over it and you would have "witch goth". Either way, we need to fucking bring these shoes back!

Those glasses though!

There were a few more "trad" looks found on Johnson's Winter 1998 collection. Suddenly there's big hair! What happened? It also looks very Kinderwhore, appropriate to it's time.
Check out that white dress look! We need to sport white goth outfits more often! Aside from a huge white button up shirt, I never did!

I have found the 1997 runaway on youtube. Shitty quality and it's uploaded in 4 parts, but part nr. 2 (below) is where it's at, and where the looks from the beginning of the post are taken:

I loved the entire show!

Would you rock this look or is it dated/ cheesy? Is this "very 90s NYC?"

What are your recent style inspirations?

Time to blast off some Mephisto Waltz and pretend I can stand 90s gothic rock :)

Maria

The Pleasure and Sorrows of Prog II

Click here for the previous post.

Just when frustration with being a lonely progressive rock lover leaves you with enough emotions to write lyrics for an entire Van Der Graaf Generator album, there is suddenly hope ahead.
Let's begin with what I first stumbled across - an entire Wiki How on the subject of "How To Enjoy Progressive Rock (with pictures!)":

Let me get this straight - someone took the time to actually write an 11 step article about how to enjoy progressive rock, with descriptions on key genres and bands, their albums, the "meaning" of progressive music both musically and conceptually and here I am sitting here speechless!

A part of me was forever grateful, but that was a small part, since writing a post this long without mentioning Van Der Graaf Generator is a fucking crime. Hello, theye're only one of the best prog bands out there! 

As well as recommending a 3-disc compilation of Genesis as a first step is a hell of a bad idea. If I'd have started with Genesis' more popier songs I would have never given that band a chance. Thank you for directing me to the point where Phil Collins ruined the band, I will hate this band forever now. Any Genesis fan who's in their right mind will tell you that the core of Genesis are a few albums like Foxtrot and Selling England By The Pound, making them indeed to be "the" prog band.

Secondly, I really do hope most of the info there was written in tongue-in-cheek, because of sentences like:
"did you know that Led Zeppelin's classic track "Stairway To Heaven" is actually a progressive rock song?"

But seriously, I was so happy to come across that Wiki How, some of my favorite steps are:

- Before listening to the music, learn and memorize the various and styles (or sub genres) of progressive rock.
Did you hear that? FUCKING memorize!
- Watch performances by progressive rock groups on YouTube, to further appreciate the talent involved.
- One of the best ways to immerse yourself in the progressive rock community is to attend a progressive rock music festival, if one is held in your area.
You know, my town in Israel had one like, every month. Great times, great times...


But wait, there's more - I have accidentally found a Facebook page dedicated to prog memes! Memes! Of course! Why haven't I thought of that?! There are so few of us we might as well gather online, hate on popular music, post about the same fucking 10 bands religiously and worship musicians who play as fast as their hormones can take them!
I was very happy to see people worshiping Opeth the same way as I do, but every meme phenomenon calls for exaggeration, and this page is no exception.
Inevitably, it's called Prog Snob:

this is how you truly make a Genesis meme!

I adore the Spongebob references

I could go on, but I have spent way too much time on that meme page laughing hysterically. So when you're ever feeling alone, just remember there's someone out there who spent their time doing this:

That's enough internet for today, so here's my favorite one:

Maria

The Pleasures and Sorrows of Prog I

Click here for part II!

Nothing says "forever alone" than loving an unpopular music genre, be it post punk, deathrock or some weird techno subgenre. This post is dedicated to one of my biggest music loves - progressive rock.

But to make matters more interesting and exciting, I have decided to  e l a b o r a t e  on how it feels to like prog whilst being a part of a certain subculture, in this case - the goth/alternative subculture. In other words - I am going to complain passionately and discuss my favorite music. But worry not, as the following post will be a lot more fun.

As you may already know through countless mentions of bands and songs on this blog, progressive rock is one of my favorite genres, and some of my favorite albums and songs are prog. My favorite band, Opeth, are prog (more prog metal, if you don't count the latest albums): I have been listening to prog metal and 70s prog rock as a teenager with my group of friends during middle and high school and I've been listening to Mars Volta religiously in the past couple of years.

The most frustrating thing about liking different music genres whilst hanging out (or assigning oneself) in a certain subculture is finding people with mutual musical interests. Except for one friend (and now 1 more, who is being converted to like prog!) I know virtually no one who likes post punk and progressive rock (except for Boris of course). I don't know any metal people, so maybe liking progressive metal is more common in the metal scene, but there is a limited amount of progressive metal I can stomach in the first place, not to mention goths are focused solely on the 80s and beyond and not so much on 70s.

The Cure in the 80s

Pink Floyd in the 70s

Plus there's the fear (and sadly I have made the experience as well) of being judged for liking a certain music genre that goes outside of the "goth box" - fuck you for making a face when I say I like metal music, or classic rock. People focus on the image you convey with your style or when you visit goth parties they think you like only goth music. If I'd liked only goth music I'd be literally dead by now, and not in the cute romantic goth way.

Plus I feel that when people in the goth subculture like heavier music they need to hide it or make it come across as "guilty pleasure music". Fuck that too - my love for Genesis is stronger than your love for Winklepickers, ok? Also I see no harm in wearing fishnets or whatever and listening to prog. Have you seen how dark and theatrical Peter Gabriel looked like in his heyday on stage!?! No, because you have been blankly staring at your drum machine, making cheap disco music with one button.

And speaking of drum machines, and more specifically - synthesizers - I have been loathing minimal synth music and telling everyone all about it, but simply because the sky is literally the fucking limit when it comes to what you can do on the synthesizer in progressive rock. And I am not talking about insane Keith Emerson solos (some people can't calm the fuck down), I am talking about beautiful atmospheric sounds that can convey not only emotion but also tension in a very good composed song (aka Pink Floyd).

Peter Gabriel of Genesis

I am not saying everyone in the goth subculture are discriminating against people with different musical preferences, but I am saying they're more accepting towards musical genres that have more to do with goth, which makes 100% sense, but we don't all enjoy punk bands out there, and should I really elaborate on why some of the most famous and notable rock bands of all time are prog bands?

Perhaps I love prog so much because I spent my entire childhood and teenage years listening to classical music - my mom would put cds on and play the piano, and from age 10 I began playing the recorder and studying baroque and classical music, and that has turned my musical perception and understanding of it completely around.

And it all comes down to prog rock fans, who are generally huge music nerds who either have something to do with music theory or classical music, hence making them incredibly snobbish.

Oh, I have been that route alright - knowing music theory, analyzing the songs, thinking I was the only person around me who really understood where the best music was at.

Progressive rock provided me what no other rock music did - complex rhythms and beautiful harmonies and musicians with incredible skill to look up to, without them having to wear a suit and tie in a "high society" philharmonic orchestra.

Funny enough, prog wasn't the candidate to replace classical music for me, as that demanded something a lot more heavier in the simple and minimalist sense of the word - aka punk 77, post punk, dark electro and other metal genres, which I still proudly love.

Flip it around and you have prog people who hate on 4/4 time signatures, worship the fastest drummers/guitarists and look down upon popular music and the people who listen to it. That's pretty much how a lot of classical music people I studied with back in the day were acting, and that wasn't cute either.

John Petrucci & Jordan Rudess of Dream Theater

As my friend (the one who's being converted) said: "goth is lazy music", in the sense that once you listen to progressive subgenres like prog metal, post hardcore or mathcore, minimalist music that's being made with 1 synthesizer with the excuse of singing about "heavy" themes and dressing like (allegedly) no one else does, gives the impression like the people who're making it are investing no effort at all into the composition and diversity of the music, which if you ask me, can very well be achieved with 1 synthesizer. The question is, are you riding on the same wave as the bands before you or are you truly giving a though to create something unique? That is the one thing I don't get about the various wave genres, which are very interesting and unique genres.

The different aspects of what makes music to be "good music" is as subjective as anything in life itself, so I might as well end this post on the following note:
I like different music genres, there's no going around it for me, and there's no way in hell I can ever be satisfied with one music genre for the rest of my life. A kind of musicgenreamory, if you will. 

And I hate being judged for one of the things I take a certain amount of pride in: When questioned about why I like a certain genre, is for me the equivalent of being questioned about my identity, about who I am, as if I need to validate something about my individuality. 

Fuck those people. they don't know what they're talking about, and I said it before and will continue saying it again: don't let a certain stream, be it music, literature, fashion etc. dictate your entire life and put you in a box. 

And who will put you in a box exactly? Firstly, you yourself, but also the people you hang out with. Fuck those people, they are missing out on so many musically various adventures they will die of boredom in the court of the crimson king.

the most beautiful thing you'll heard today: The Mars Volta performing Asilos Magdalena

For more subculture related posts, click here.

Maria

Goth Youtubers - 90s Goth with Angela Benedict

Some of you loyal readers will remember my "Why I Dislike Goth Youtubers Post" back from last year (and I also remember the majority of you agreeing with me, than you, thank you...) but I've been spending so much time on YouTube lately that I feel like it would be hypocritical of me to say that I dislike ALL goth youtubers (which I have disclaimed in the mentioned post, but still).

Yet recently I have discovered a relatively new youtuber that has been doing something no other goth youtuber that I know has done - educating you on the past!

The thing is, most (goth) youtubers are either teenagers or in their 20s, and rarely do you get a person above 30. Not to mention the topics usually addressed by most youtubers who claim to belong to a certain subculture are not exactly versatile.

But what I was happy to discover were Angela Benedict's many stories about how the gothic subculture looked like back in the 90s (note: in New York). Being someone who only discovered goth from 2005/6 and on, I find it fascinating to listen to a person who has actually been in the scene in the 90s to tell you how things were, ranging from what music was played, what clothes and styles were worn and how the people were like. I wish someone from the 80s would have done the same thing!
I wrote a "Beginning of 00s Goth" post in the past as well, so the style recaps definitely spoke to me.

I guess the thing with youtubers is that the personality and way of speech of a person can affect your liking/disliking them, and in this case, I absolutely love how Angela tells stories and the way she's communicating, I find it very straightforward and relaxed. I also love the old school video editing, I get annoyed when youtubers have an intro that can kill a PR expert.


One of my favorite videos is Gothic Fashion as a 90s Teen:

For the record, she doesn't even know that I'm writing this post, so it's not sponsored or anything (I will tell her as soon as this gets published).

Her Hairfalls tutorial is also quite the thing. It's not my style of hair but the spirit of the 90s is definitely there:

Have some of you been goth in the late 90s/beginning of 00s? What was the gothic subculture like back then? I hope you found Angela's videos entertaining as much as I did.

Happy Halloween to those who are celebrating!

Maria

London 2016

Just came back from a week-trip to London. It was our first time in the city, and the trip was arranged through Boris's parents who have been there few times before and love coming back.

I liked London. Yes, it was posh, but it still felt good. I liked Oxford Street with it's endless shopping experience, I liked how people were dressed with no trend being left out (people were simply pretty); I liked Camden with it's mainstream "alternative" vibe, it was cool as hell despite the ridiculous "gothic" shops lol.

The greatest feeling was to actually be in the city where my favorite music has begun. Punk, post punk and goth have been centered in London and even though it's not 1977 anymore, there was still something in the air...
And that was how we met a guy who once had drinks with Jayne County, visited a second hand shop held by the guitar player of Vibrators and went to Highgate Cemetery where Malcolm Mclaren is buried!

Highgate Cemetery

We also ate everything we could find and drank disappointingly bitter beer and some very nice fresh ciders. We were out of money 2 days before the plane home. Luckily Boris's parents were there to save us. We spent the rest on books which I will share in a separate post.

I didn't think London would touch me as much as it did. It would be so cool to live there some day. That's just my imagination talking, but who knows? It did seem like there's a lot more room for indie and guitar music there than in Berlin. Living there sounds more exciting than visiting as a tourist. So it was not the last trip for sure.

Maria

Visiting a rock bar in Tashkent

One of the coolest experiences from Uzbekistan was going to ST Bar (бар Своя Территория) - one of the only rock bars in Tashkent! (there's also a place called Tapas bar, but we didn't have a chance to go there).
We were curious about the local alternative scene and came across the bar by mistake. So we decided to drop on an open mic night to maybe play some Girls Like Us songs (even if it meant playing without drums and bass lol).
We even managed to slip in a cover of Adore Delano's I Adore You. And let me tell you, covering a song by a drag queen at an open mic night in Tashkent was one of the best experiences of my life.
It turned out quite riot girl-sounding:

Watch my mom sing right after us!!

The alternative scene in Tashkent are just a few people fighting to be themselves in a country that permits very little. The fact that someone will go unharmed on the street with facial piercings & dressed in black is already a miracle. It was nice to see how everyone keeps close and the atmosphere was very warm.

Why haven't I checked the local scene before? Well, frequent visits to Uzbekistan meant mostly family-time only, and my cousins (21 & 18 yrs) are mostly into rap music/ rap battles. Boris and I haven't thought about it when we came 2 years ago either. I don't know why. Maybe because coming to Uzbekistan meant coming to an obscure place, completely detached from what we are used to?

Why yes, Boris does sport a David Sylvian-inspired look these days.

with ST's art director, Gotya. We had a nice talk with him about the local scene.

All pics courtesy to ST bar, thanks guys!!

So if you are out there in far central Asia, definitely have a visit to ST! They serve smoked cheese as a beer side dish!

We will definitely drop by again when we will go to Uzbekistan next time, It's cool to find a hangout in strange places.

Maria

Interview with TRAITRS - dark post punk from Toronto!

Get this - bands are contacting me for mentions! Who knew that my blog will get this far? I was very happy to check TRAITS out and discover new music, I liked the dark post punky vibes and the straightforward singing that rings in your ear. 

So without further adieu, and make sure to check out further links at the end of the post! 

1. TRAITRS consists of 2 longtime friends, how has your friendship affected the music writing?

NOLAN: Shawn and I are always on the exact same page as far as musical direction goes so we never really argue about anything. This makes the songwriting come very natural and easy. There's an honesty and comfort level between us that can only exist between two close friends. So if a song isn't working and needs to be scrapped or a lyric is rubbish or a synth line could be better, we have no problem calling attention to it. There's never any tension or hurt feelings. 100% of the time if one of us notices something good or bad in a track eventually the other will hear it and agree. We constantly sacrifice mediocre material for something stronger. Shawn and I also have the exact same sense of humour so we can spend a ridiculous amount of time together in the studio and on the road and always have a good laugh. Honestly, this is an absolutely crucial component of Traitrs. Despite how dark and gloomy the music is, we're both a couple of silly fucks.

Source

2. You are based in Toronto, how would you describe the music scene there (and in Canada in general)?

NOLAN: The Canadian music stereotype that immediately comes to mind is boring, vanilla, folksy, middle-of-the-road, softer than baby shit pop-rock that nobody outside of Canada would ever listen to. Mainstream Canadian music totally blows. However there are so many wicked independent bands, record labels, producers, recording studios and artists all across Canada putting out really great music right now. And they're finally starting to get some much deserved recognition abroad. You can see it in the recent critical successes of artists like Dilly Dally, Greys, Odonis Odonis, Weaves, Austra, Grimes etc. As for Toronto itself, there isn't a definitive "Toronto sound" but the Toronto music community is very eclectic and incredibly supportive of one another. What's rad is whether you're in a punk band, post-punk band, hardcore band, art rock band, metal band, electronic act or whatever-the-fuck band, there's support for you here. It's not as though one genre or style dictates the "Toronto sound". Everyone kinda does their own thing and the scene supports that.

this beautiful EP cassette is unfortunately sold out :(

3. Your EP Rites & Ritual has been compared to Bauhaus and Pornography-era The Cure. What are some other musical acts that have influenced your music?

TUCKER: Early on we were listening to a lot of The Sound, Southern Death Cult, Dead Can Dance, The Opposition, Asylum Party as well as The Cure, Bauhaus, The Smiths etc. Sean and I have always been drawn to dark, moody, cold music and knew Traitrs would follow in that direction. 

NOLAN: When I was writing the drums for Rites And Ritual, I was listening extensively to the first two Dead Can Dance albums as well as a lot of aboriginal and Native American drum circles for inspiration which explains all the tribal, tom-heavy rhythms on the record. For us, the drums and rhythms set the mood and tone for Traitrs and we build on top of that.

4. You touch on occult themes in your song lyrics; is witchcraft a significant part of your lives?

TUCKER: I think it's bigger than that. By the age of 11 I was so fully surrounded by ghosts, hauntings, Ouija boards and strange ass stuff. Some scary bad shit happened when I was young. I was always told "Don't talk about it or it will follow you" so, I don't. I've always been drawn to horror / occult after that and think in someways we all are. It's something inside us as humans, drawn to our worst fears. To me personally the content on Rites and Ritual was in someway me conjuring back memories and feelings from childhood. When writing the lyrics I was completely drugged up from an injury watching horror films with no recollection of exactly what I was putting down but now I listen and track by track it's like a messed up horror film meshed in with puzzle pieces of my childhood laced with so much suffering, sadness and the darkest of places.

5. Are there any places/ events where you would most like to play?

NOLAN: We definitely want to play Europe as soon as humanly possible. The record has been doing really well in Germany, the UK, Czech Republic, Italy and Greece. There are so many awesome festivals (both big and small) in Europe not to mention a hugely supportive scene for dark post-punk bands, we're dying to get over there. There are some tentative plans for Traitrs to tour Europe sometime in 2017. A few blogs in Japan supported the record as well so that's definitely on the wish list. Aside from that, we want to play as much as we can here in Canada and head down to the US as well. We want to push Traitrs as far as it can possibly go.

7. And lastly – after a long day’s work at his miserable job, Billy comes home and puts on TRAITRS in full volume. Where is your music taking him?

TUCKER: Dante's Inferno.

-----

I personally liked Youth Cults and Heretic from the EP, I find there's some Indie traces in Heretic, and you know how I like things that stray from genres. I also find the vocals to be the absolute jewel of each song, and the drum patters really get you in an avalanche.

Further band updates, check out the following:

Bandcamp - merch & more!

Soundcloud - album streaming

Official Facebook

email at: traitrstraitrstraitrs@gmail.com

Maria

Feminist role models in music & why I dislike Kim Gordon

The topic of feminist female musicians came to my mind a few times whenever I came across it on the internet. A subject mostly talked about by fellow female bloggers or musicians, it's basically when one lists female musicians or bands that have a feminist attitude that might have inspired them or served as support.
I found myself at a loss for when I tried to think of a few, and this is why I've decided to write this post.

I almost cannot name any particular female feminist role model, since I have never had the need to search for one. Call me privileged in that sense, but in all my years of listening and playing music (classical and not) I have never came across an incident that urged me to comfort or "empower" myself with female musicians screaming about social injustice.
In fact, I am a very unpolitical person and only in recent years began reading about feminism, and liking it.

But when it came to music, it has never been a topic my thoughts have drifted to. It's just music, regardless if it's a boy or a girl making it. If it has political messages, that would be a secondary thing of interest for me, as the first one would always be the music itself, and I might as well search for other kind of support in it, which is emotional - about feelings and things in your soul that trouble you and separate you from conventional society. That's what has always been on my mind.
Of course I do not enjoy bands that place women as sexual objects in lyrics and imagery, there are enough of those out there. But in the music I have always listened to it has never been a theme - not in post punk or alternative rock or progressive rock or what have you. Maybe if you come from other genres as metal or punk or hardcore you would have a different experience.

Speaking of bands, I find some particular female band members being adored as feminist role models. I would like to mention Kim Gordon, the bassist of Sonic Youth, as an example for that, .
I am quite surprised as to how many women musicians look up to her. In my personal opinion she's just another bass player. As a bassist she has never inspired me, I don't think she plays very well, her bass lines are often stray from harmony (because it's noise rock, ugh) but I don't personally see it as a smart move for a bass part (guitar yes, not bass) and I dislike her singing voice. She allegedly wrote feminist lyrics which you can hardly understand since they're really abstract, as all Sonic Youth lyrics.
I do like the band as a whole, bus I appreciate any bass player based on the context of the music they place their bass line in. And I just don't think Kim Gordon does that very well.

I find it difficult to talk about feminist musicians since most of the feminist oriented music I heard was completely indigestible. Bikini Kill are a strong band, but their music is horrible, even from a punk perspective. And mention any hardcore feminist band and it would be even worse - how can you understand the lyrics with all the screams? How is that a good message?
Speaking of punk, I completely detest the idea of expressing political opinions through aggression and rage. That is the one thing I have always disliked about punk in general, female or male, feminist or with any other political views - you will not convince me to think like you if you scream and express hate and violence, despite being the victim yourself (which might be in many cases relatable). You will not convince me by being vegan in screaming in my ear, and you will certainly not convince the average joe like that. So with any other good political message - if the music sucks nobody will be interested.

The only feminist female band I have ever related to were strangely Jack Off Jill. Now, I know what you're thinking - how are they different with all the screams and rage and, quite frankly, all the exaggerated childish "he was a bad boyfriend" lyrics and provocative attire.
I honestly don't know why I like them, maybe because when I heard them I was a teenager and the ideas seemed childish but fun to me. And I liked the unapologetic rage, which even then I realized was an allegory, a sort of theater if you will.
But I have not met a single person who knew about JOJ who hadn't come from some dark corner of the internet, which is a shame.

So it's all a matter of perspective on music and bands, I know and acknowledge that. But let me say this - just because a women is playing in a band doesn't mean it's a feminist act. If you play shit, you're music will be shit. All depends on how one presents things. and I do not deny entering a very controversial topic here.
I would be much more convinced of feminist ideas when there would be heterosexual men screaming about it, and playing damn well while they're at it; When there would be queer people in bands; When all-male bands won't use naked women for album covers. Just because a woman is singing about something is not enough good reason for me to consider it feminist, even if the idea is close to my heart.

I get a lot more "empowered" as a person when listening to music that truly speaks to me, when the ideas comfort me and make me think that I am not the only person having these thoughts about myself and the world, having these feelings. It doesn't have to be a woman, it can be anything. That's the beauty of music. I guess I am having a hard time with the idea that listening to music should be like writing a B.A assignment for political studies. You can learn from music and build your ideals without being yelled at (I am looking at you, Crass, who I equally dislike).

Or rather - don't brainwash me with anything, just be an amazing musician, the rest will come. Don't tell me anything, let me figure it out myself.

As a counter example, here's Against Me!

I don't expect anyone to agree with my opinion but thanks to the ones who read it.

Maria

Dystopain - a poerty book by d0ll (interview)

I love making interviews when I have the chance, so here is a recent one with d0ll - DJane, alt model and writer, who's collection of free verse poetry is now up online in Amazon Kindle books!

D0ll's direct and piercing poems are screaming with themes such as self image, romance and feeling anti-social in today's society, and self-made photographs from her travels cluster a search into one's self that is very personal and easily relatable.

All links and references are included bellow.

d0ll

M: When did you start writing poetry? What inspired you to?

D: I first started writing poems during my teenage years. I think it all started as a way to deal with emotions, experiences and the outside world. To this day, some of my writings are as if therapeutic in a way, helping me digest negative experiences and feelings and helping me remember the positive ones and all the shades in between. The other kind of poetry I write is more social or sometimes anti-social and written a little bit from a different perspective.

From Anxiety:

"Armor of inner safety falls on the floor

Attraction that leads to self-destruction

Astonishment that reaches you deeper

Angry voices screaming

At you

Aggression strikes you like a bell that tolls

A hand moves on the handle on the door..."

M: Your poems are very straightforward – we get to see the writer and become her. Were you inspired by any writers or poets in particular? (Or any other literature you are inspired by?)

D: There are certain writers and poets that I enjoy reading very much, especially classics – Honoré Balzac, Oscar Wilde, Vladimir Nabokov, Jane Austen. I like reading romantic poetry, but also modern and post-modern poetry, I enjoy horror stories, historic fiction and some (mainly older) detective fiction. But I’m open to a plenty of genres if I feel a book has something interesting tell me and is able to draw and keep my attention. As much as I love literature, I don’t see myself as influenced by any writers in particular. Although it might be a question that’s easier to answer for someone reading my poetry or short stories. I would say my inspiration from writing comes from what I observe around myself or from my experience, some of it from music, paintings, drawings and photographs that I have seen. I’ve noticed that surrealist and expressionist artworks tend to move me and influence me. A bit of my inspiration might also flow from post punk music ;)


M: Self-image is a recurring theme in the book, what has moved you to focus on it?

D: To me poetry is like a mirror reflecting the same person, the same picture or surroundings every time you look in it, but from various angles and in a changing light. So my poems, for a part, are as if my own mirror reflecting everything through my eyes only my viewpoint is slightly changing with time. But I have also written poems that attempt to look at myself from a different person’s perspective.


From The Sea Remains Silent:

"I stand here and wait 

In hope that I will feel 

Your ghost somewhere near 

A last gust of the wind 

A last touch on my skin

You don’t seem to come back

To say goodbye I fear"

M: Is writing a process that occurs easily to you, or do you need to be in a specific mindset in order to write?

D: Writing is a process that happens automatically, in my case, anyway. I sometimes get an urge to write and must write down what it is on my mind. Or if I cannot do that immediately, I try to hold the thought, the words in my mind and scribble it as soon as I can. I never “decide” to write, in fact sometimes I am tired and just want to sleep or do nothing, but my inspiration won’t wait. And many times, I write almost despite myself, drowning in a particular negative experience again for some time, in order to “process“ it into a poem.


M: Aside from writing you also DJane and model. These are all very different mediums of self-expression, what do you experience with each? Which do you connect with more?

D: These diverse mediums have become important parts of my life. I must say that writing is very often connected to negative emotions and experiences in my life – or realizing certain precious and positive moments after they’ve already passed. Still, I feel a sense of satisfaction and peace after finishing a poem or a short story, after expressing an emotion or a vision in its whole.
DJing is an activity that is linked to pleasure in my mind, the cheer of enjoying great music and letting others enjoy it with me, giving some joy also to those that are listening in a way. It’s also about always discovering new music that I enjoy or don’t enjoy. It is, like with many things, a process of continuous education.
Modelling is attractive to me, mostly because of cooperating with creative and talented people and combining our ideas and turning them into something new every time. I like seeing the results just as much as I enjoy the process of creation.


From Piece Me Together:

"I keep on writing this story 

Which I can’t seem to finish 

And the same events always occur 

At the end of the day 

When you look at me
Don’t say you’re sorry 

The suffering is self-inflicted 

It takes one girl to break 

This body and mind

Don’t say you’re sorry

Just make sure 
I’m not out of sight"

M: You chose English for your poetry. Why so, and are you planning on writing in other languages?

D: I didn’t choose English, I think English chose me. ;) It has been the most natural language to write in for me for years, despite not being my mother tongue. To this day, all poems and short stories I have written are in English with the exception of one poem, which is in Slovak. Maybe in the future I will write in Dutch as well. Depends on what will feel natural to me. Anyway, I think Dutch is a poetic language and I’m fluent in it, so I might as well write in it someday.


M: Anything else you would like to add? 

D: Thank you for asking me your thoughtful questions. For anyone reading, I hope you enjoyed this introduction of the person responsible for writing the book Dystopain. There’s more to come in the not-so-far future. ;)

Get the book on Amazon Kindle edition.

D0ll can also be found at:
Official DJane Facebook page
Wake The Bats - Deathrock/old school goth/post punk/wave party in Bratislava, Slovakia
Official modeling page
Tumblr
D0ll on Leaves Of Ink

All pictures by d0ll.

Maria Alexander

Girls Like Us / Single Tonight (rehearsal session)

I am really happy to share a rehearsal recording of a previously unheard song by our band, Girls Like Us!
I would love it endlessly if you could check it out!!

Sound quality is shit but we are glowing with drive! ♥

Links go without saying:


Girls Like Us
Official Facebook.
Bandcamp.

Maria

PS

See you in 2 weeks, time to visit the past.

Goth Bands I Hate

I am ashamed of myself for not writing this post so far! Me, of all people - to not shower the bands you love with shit!
In no particular order (although they could all be number one):

Source

The Sisters Of Mercy

Really, spare me the excuses. Fucking boring ass band, every song sounds the same, completely overrated, and worst of all - the low monotonic voice that pretty much settled the "gothic rock vocals standard".
Now, I do admit liking Body Electric, no party is complete without it, and Suzanne is nice too. But everything else??? I don´t get the First And Last album, you could make so much more of those acoustic guitars and vocal melodies, but where is the dynamic in the voice? Why there´s none?
The best thing that has happened to this band was Patricia Morrison who is a badass.

And I am not hating on this band because of Eldritch´s lousy personality, if only that would have been the reason to hate them I would have kept quiet, I swear...


Christian Death

Another ridiculously overrated band. Ok, Romeo´s Distress is a nice song, even though the entire album is completely bloating with Rozz´s shapeless whiny vocals. What´s with the singing?!?! Can´t you sing one tune and not whine about your miserable existence? There are plenty of good whining techniques out there, I am sure of it. And a lot more original lyrics to express yourself with.
And dear god, every song is loaded with an avalanche of guitars and rhythms and what not, so you cannot digest it properly. Why is there so much going on? Just chill, have some descent song structure for once.
And I know Rozz can sing, you can hear it in his solo career here and there. It´s just, ugh...
But I guess I respect this band since they´ve paved the way to deathrock as we know it (and don´t let me start trashing deathrock as we know it!).


Fields Of The Nephilim

So you´ve put flour on your clothes and cowboy hat...
Seriously this is one of these bands that I just... I can´t even begin. Every song sounds the same, rhythm is identical, style is revolting and why the hell does it sound like industrial metal sometimes? Or 90s rave, can´t decide... most melodies are cheesy anyways, even sounds like pop music sometimes. Bad pop music.

Source

Type O Negative

Again, this is one of these bands that I just keep pulling my hair out trying to figure out why people like them. Ok, Peter Steel was apparently hot or something, and he was a good bassist? Correct me if I´m wrong...

But oh god, it´s just the epitome of boredom! It´s slow, and you would expect it to be interesting since it´s borderline metal but no -  here come the typical low singing again. Why, oh god why...

Can´t even decide if it´s too much or too little in a song, but I can´t remember a single tune by them. ever.

Alien Sex Fiend

I guess this a band you either love or hate. As much as I love the Batcave era, Alien Sex Fiend are just too much. I mean, what the hell is going on in each song? There´s so much noise and frantic vocals, you can´t understand if it´s spooky or ridiculous (although this is what pretty much makes ASF what they are...).

I can bare with them I guess, because I can see how they have influenced whatever came later, and the Batcave was a great place for self expression, but I need a few days off after hearing one song.

My take home message for you: please, if you have a goth band, have all the fun there is, but please don´t sing low like you´re about to turn your throat inside out. Just this one little thing, and you are good to go with your ever-so-original music forward.

Do you have goth bands that you hate? Have I pissed you off with this post? You are welcome to write a similar one if you wish!

Maria

When Goth Fails You

An inspirational post mainly for myself in order to find solace in things that do not fall into the Goth umbrella term.
For years I have been swimming in the black goth pool trying to find myself and feel comfortable with who I am and what I want; what I want to surround myself with, what I want to listen to and be a part of, etc etc...
Yet (ironically) with the richness of the subculture in Berlin I found that I have drained it for myself and am now yearning for something new - something different that will make me feel individual and unique, without necessarily closing myself in a black velvet box and putting a sticker that says "goth" on it.
I have been enjoying it for a long time, but it is time to go forward.

I personally think that this change occurred because of 2 things:

1. Boris and I got into the queer scene.
2. Making music together has made me realize that playing it live will include little to no goth-related events/ crowd.

So here are some things where I feel a part of, that are not gothically inclined.

These things include bands, scenes, clothes and everything else which constructs one´s environment.

Garage, Indie, Grunge, Noiserock

And generally noisy lo-fi guitar music that can easily be dark or light. I am sick of darkwave, modern witch house and similar, I want to kill the people that make it. Needless to say that there is so much to guitar music than post punk, which in its broad interpretations can be as monotone and boring or as avant-garde as you would like it to be (or to make!).

Scratch Acid

Cold In Berlin

The Queer Community

I found that in so many queer bars and parties Boris and I could be ourselves without being started at, without feeling threatened, while being surrounded by nice people who would be labeled outsiders by everyone else. The events we love to go to feature 80s, post punk and wave music and it´s simply a delight. Sometimes a bit of pop and a Drag Show can lift your spirits up as well. It´s a nice way to meet like-minded people outside of your usual goth circle, and to be welcome as you are. 

Source

Mainstream Fashion

How can you feel special when you are dressed like everybody else? By taking bits and pieces of styles, toning them down and combining them with mainstream clothes. Why? Because less is more, and you know you are unique enough on the inside. Also, as my teenage self once told me- dress in a way that people will not know what music you listen to.

pictures found on Pinterest

Do you have inspiring things outside the goth spectrum?

Maria