22 December 2012

Sei Stolz

As I rode the night bus deadly drunk and partially getting sober, I observed the city lights as they come and go like in a race. And I thought, this night felt like saying goodbye to a place that felt like our home for quite a while. A place that made the gothic subculture in some way alive, the people were very close to us even if it meant we saw them only at parties, the DJs, the music we knew like out own 5 fingers.... and this was the last party, this was our last hangout at our small home.

We'll have to say goodbye to a lot of things. All the things we knew, but we knew that could be better, if only we'd been born in a different country. There's no point regretting the one you are and the one you could be, because there's no point at doing that, but I am guessing this thought was present a while in my heart. Why? Imagine living all your life knowing that everything you love is located in a completely different place, and you won't have it until you'll work a descent fight.

Today was hard. I skipped work because I was too drunk and tired, and me and Boris finally moved to my mother's place. It was hard considering we did everything on our own without a vehicle, walking with stuff here and back, but eventually we did it.
It is a deadly strike to me to go back to my mother's place, of different reasons I don't want to write about yet. Let's just say I ran away from that house as if escaping a plague, to get just a tiny bit of privacy, and to be alone with Boris at last.
And here we are, just like the old days- living 3 people in one room, that stupid 2 floored bed, absence of place and never ever quiet. I will have to get used to it, or just let it not bother me so much as it did all those years.
That is, I'll have to suffer [if I will] until the 15 of January.

Remember this post?
 Boris and I will move to Germany on the 15th of January.
With much luck for the rest of our lives.

+ Nebel Violet +


  1. So little till you guys move! hang on :)



  2. Oh, that's lovely you're moving - have you decided exactly where in Germany you will go yet?

    1. I love Berlin - so happy for you guys! ♥

    2. Thanks, we've been in love with the city for a few years now. Hope things go well.