Happy Halloween!

Today was such a nice day!
I finally cured myself from the sickness that took over me lately, I've cleaned the whole house myself [still can't believe that happened] and even got to settle a proper Samhain altar and made some Halloween crafting!

And to think this is the first time I ever celebrate Halloween, wow, how unfortunate. Gotta move faster to Germany to feel  like a human gothy being more often.

I bought some bristol board today [it costed pennies, hurra!] and made these cute bats. It was a dream of mine to have my own room with gothy decorations. Finally coming true! I hate it so much when the walls are empty, need to make some spiderwebs if I'll have time.

Boris also feels the holiday spirit and he even shaved his beard and mustache! That was actually yesterday, but it looks so nice, and makes him look younger [he's like a year and a half older than me lol]. he generally likes it more without having hair on his face because it will be easier to put on makeup. 

Have a great Samhain and Halloween everyone! Hope you're not sick and have a nice place to party at.

Next post theme: Israel's first Gothic festival [makes me giggle every time I think about it].

+ Nebel Violet +

My first Demonias

Thursday Boris' gift for my birthday has finally arrived in the mail!!

 Demonia swing 220 in PU

I've been wanting Demonia shoes for so many years, but never had the money or reason to buy them. I always thought that I could save the day when I'll get a pair.

But Boris' birthday in May set a start to our tradition giving each other shoes [well, we did it only once maybe it'll continue]. And they say giving shoes to each other as a gift is a bad thing :D

I bought Boris these babies:

He wanted high heels for some time inspired by 70's bands and Tom Waits [who wore red stilletoes in one of his video clips]. Boris wears those on very special occasions, having sometimes trouble stabling himself but he likes them very much ^^

I was so excited when I opened that box...

I was nervous that the size wouldn't fit, but it was PERFECT!!

I rocked them out at a party yesterday, and it was great! The platfors are so comfortable, and the shoes didn't blister my feet at all! The only difficult part was that the material is a bit hard and it's difficult to bend the ankle, but all in all it was great! It makes me so tall, best feeling ever. And adds so much to the outfit.

I am so happy I got my first Demonia shoes thanks to my darling [and his parents apparently! How sweet of them]. It was the best present ever, I thanked my love a thousand times.

Next up is to get those beautifully desired winter clothes out of the closet and start dressing like a human being at last.

I hope to get the pics of yesterdays Halloween party soon, it was loads of fun.

Have nice and cold days everyone!

+ Nebel Violet +

My New Jeffrey Campbell Shoes

Are fake and gay, or should I say- false and homosexual.

I was drooling over those shoes for a while now after seeing them in loads of Nu Goth picture the world so hates and I humbly so adore.

And then a friend has told me they have these exact same as Campbell's only at an outlet store of an Israeli brand!!!!! They look exactly the same. Nothing smells better than a cheep fake example of a fancy designed item.

I bought them for really cheap, they are sooo comfortable, believe me, says a girl who detests high heels.

I actually want to walk on heels but the reason I am not doing so is;

- I walk very fast and for very long all the time, and heels delete those options for me.

- Heels always make my legs callus no matter for how long I wear them.

- I tend to be too tall and I like my combats instead anyway.

But this time it was different. Might I add these shoes look like some mutation of Demonia + combat boots? Me like.

Hoping to rock them out at the EBM party this friday!

+ Nebel Violet +

60's party!

Boris will DJ today at a Woodstock party held by our beloved goth club.
Funny that the second stage would have 80's hits, I am constantly in doubt where will I dance more.

Things have been going well thanks to more Wicca practice...
I have more time fore things, and Boris is having fun with some culinary experiments.
This last time he made a fish & сream and with onion, it was delicious! I made my occasional spaghetti. I hate cooking really.

This would be my witchy outfit for the party tonight, having the 60's and their psychedelic depths in mind. The fishnet shirt would go with a long black skirt and my combats.

I mischievously look pale in the light. I am not near pale, I'm yellow like a Chinese slave, thought I got less tanned this summer than what I had expected. Yay!

Speaking of... I dunno:

I'm in such a good mood I might as well draw some models today for my portfolio for my future fashion studies.

Have a nice and rockin Friday everyone, don't forget to listen to tons of good music!

+ Nebel Violet +

My Favorite Author

For my borthday, by my good friend Avichi, I was given the third book of the series by Carlos Ruiz Safon.
He is a spanish writer who is my ultimate favorite. I cannot even describe what his novels make me feel, the way he inspired me since I was 15....

His first book I randomly found in my family's house back when I was 15. It was translated to russian and had a pretty interesting cover, later I found out it had stunning romantically gothic sketches inside.
The story of me beginning to read this book was a while after me and Boris first met, and I had discovered he reads tons of books and only in russian, not barely in hebrew. I wasn't even close to a reader back then and I thought, hey, why not trying to read a book in my mother language, for fuck's sake??
So I found The Shadow of The Wind. My mother jolly noted that I would LOVE this book and it would really suit my age. She wasn't wrong. I don't know how to even write this down, when I was almost swallowing this amazing story of Barcelona and it's mysteries, those enchanting books and the gothic-some themes everywhere. I cried like a madman at the end. I never cried from a book that way in my life.

The russian example of The Shadow Of The Wind that I own.

A few years later I was excited to by the second continuous novel, The Angle's Game. This time I spontaneously bought it at a book store in hebrew, and it was amazing as always, thought I kind of missed the russian translation and the beauty of the language, but it was also satisfying to dive into the same world again.

The Angle's Game in hebrew

And then I, again, spontaneously found another book by Safon in the teen section, which occurred to me as "teen fiction" labeled.  I hated that label immediately hence the book was so enchanting and wonderful I absolutely fell in love with it, and I highly recommend it if you enjoy Tim Burton's movies or anything a like. 

 The Prince of Mist in hebrew. Such a hideous cover.

I just finished reading the third and last novel by Safon, The Prisoner of Heaven. I cried again, and I was so happy to read again something with such passion, to not want to lay my eyes off of the book. I promised myself already that I will by every single book Safon has and will publish, and I also hope I would be able to find a copy in english of one. I adore everything in his stories, they tell dark tales of horrid reality, but still he manages to save something warm and good of friendship in love, and people who you'd like to meet and who you'd like to be your friends. The characters are interesting, and places, and I'm not a fan of Barcelona but ever since I red the first book I want to visit there.

Fun Fact: my mother went to Barcelona about 2 years ago with an organized tour. Somewhere in the city the tour guide pointed to an alley stating that "that was the alley that inspired Safon to describe the path to the Cemetery of Forgotten Books". Who won't like to visit in such a wonderful place? My mother took a picture of that alley especially for me.

The Prisoner of Heaven.

I highly recommend to read one of these, I think that also for the gothicly inclined that can much inspire.

+ Nebel Violet +

Paganism and Wicca

I recently had a whole week and a half off from work, which was a complete splendor! We finally finished with all the furnishing and decorating of our house and even some friends visited us by turn. It was really nice and now we have a good atmosphere at home.

I've recently been very calm in mind and had solitude within I haven't felt for two long.

There are many reasons why I am interested in Wicca and Paganism, similar to my interest with Goth I would say. Sadly I hadn't had the concentration in me to seriously begin practicing it or even having an altar, due to obvious circumstances in my life. I began to get into Wicca when I was about 18 [?] and when I spent horrifying 9 months in the army believing in the Moon helped me to believe in myself and eventually in the world.

I always felt I wasn't old enough for Wicca, or I was distracted in my life by other things, mostly unfortunate and challenging... Although, and it's funny for me to confess with it, ever since I turned 21, and my German teacher who is heavily into esoteric things and witchcraft as well, told me it's the age when things change and different understandings began to evoke, I started to dig deep into the subject. Cornelia [my German teacher] also gave me a book by Elisabeth Heich called Initation, and I will spare time a day to read it, to learn more, as I am having the feeling I can get concentrated on spiritual things better that of what I was before this current age. I tend to believe that mentally I am a late bloomer, and that I began to have the courage and energy to all things I loved after passing my teenage years, but that's a story to a different post.

I am very afraid of casting real spells, because I need to read more and research. Yesterday Boris and I found a table on the roof of our new house [amusing as it was] and I've decided to make it my altar. I have many candles which never seem enough, and I am preparing myself for what will be my first official Wiccan holiday- The Samhain, which is naturally compared to the well known Halloween [which is obviously not celebrated in our country].
I am reading a lot about what this holiday of the Fall means, of the Dark time of year coming forward and the rising dead, also the following colors and fruits that accompany this holiday, a time of change and good decisions, about the mixture of Darkness and Light.

Before being overwhelmed with all this beauty I must in some way disclame that I don't like to follow rules, and back when I was 18 first reading about Wicca I discovered it can pretty much be anything you like [just like Goth!], as long as you respect the nature and it's creatures, and everything Wicca means to that. I've always adored the Moon, I loved the trees and their power, and I am more than eager to learn more.

So far my first spell or blessing, it doesn't matter how to call it, was the blessing of our new house, and cleaning it from bad spirits [there were some, I tell you!] that Cornelia has taught me. I was very happy to use it, and my biggest debate so far is to whether write my chants in hebrew or in english [or in russian, the hell!] because I really want to use a language I can relate to, and I can memorize and rhyme chants easily. I thought about using all languages I know for the matter, even german, and I think it couldn't hurt.

This was my little Wiccan update, this first of the kind. I wanted to open a Wicca blog, but it requires me to find good other bloggers, and I'm afraid of not having time for the matter, thought I will consider this anyway, hence I wanted this blog to be personal/ Goth related only. Who knows!

Blessed Be, dears.

UPDATE:

I've done it, I've opened a secondary blog!
Wicca only.
You're welcome:
Under The Silver Moon

My Style Inspirations

I had and have many, yet through the years of me discovering Goth I didn't really express myself through clothing much. This has obviously changed, I will sort some of them here, the current styles/ people that inspire me currently:

Punk & Deathrock

Because no matter what, I can proudly say i was always inspired by Punk anyway, even before I got to Goth. I love it, I love what the subculture and music did to the whole musical and cultural history, and I think it's the basic of Goth in any case. It's where Goth DIY started, it's where almost everything I like started for me. I must confess that I do not like the music much, but I like the energy of it and it's principle.

Blixa Bargeld

When me and Boris first discovered of Einstuerzende Neubauten and found out about industrial music, Blixa started to have a major impact of everything we listen to/ wear. Everything he does, the way he looks like, his music, what he did with Nick Cave, everything is almost religiously influenced my mind. I respect this person so much, and there's also a separate facebook page dedicated to his hair. Fuck that! he is half punk to me, and always meant a lot.

Iva Insane

 

I won't lie to you- Adora Batbrat has inspired me as well, but when I saw Iva, my heat gave in to her. Because I think, and kill me for saying this, that she is much prettier than her sister, she is much more unique, I think she fights a lot in her life, and I also think she is very talented in everything she does. Her looks and makeup styles inspire me always. I just love her so much!

Daniel Ash

Well, Bauhaus in general, which were also almost religious to me back when I was 16. But Ash... maybe it's his gayish look, maybe because he is actually an amazing guitar player and I just adore what he did with Tones On Tail, but I think he is pretty special, and pretty damn deathrock if you'll notice. I love the way he wears his torn clothes, his hair, his disgusting eyebrows. I love everything in him. And especially the way he plays guitar.

I guess these are pretty much my current inspirations, or the ones I can list out. If I'll remmeber anything else I'll share with you.

There are also some minor figures that I just adore within the scene, such as Tilo Wolff and Anja Huwe of Xmal Deutschland...

 

Till next time!

+ Nebel Violet +

A dream come true?

Ever since the 6th grade I've been dreaming of becoming a model. This decision was made after realizing that I am no good at anything regarding mathematics or science, and in general I had always trouble getting good grades at school. I did good at things I loved such as music, art, literature and english, but that came only later on when I went to high school [and then again I didn't have straight A's so to speak].

And from one hand, my mother always told me how I am difficult in educating, how lazy am I and I will never succeed and literary have no brains. This really was hard on me when I was in elementary school because I thought I wasn't good at anything.

But from the other hand, my mother always told me how beautiful I am, and what beautiful face and body and hands do I have and me being the prettiest of the entire class etc. etc...

I don't know how this influence me nowadays, I don't really care about the tastes of my mother, but the past month has been full of interesting photoshoots and others are soon to come.

And I wonder if one day I could really model seriously. I obviously don't have the weight and height to be a fashion model [and that world is so damn dirty anyway] but I do have the characteristics and ability to show something pretty and interesting using my body and face. So I can always try, no?

What I'm trying to say here, is that we always crave to fulfill our dreams, we set high obstacles to ourselves that we hope one day to achieve, we dream but sometimes we don't fight enough to make those dreams come true, or they being left as a mere fantasy and we forget about them only to remember them years later and regret we haven't done them when we had the time/age.

It's hard for me to believe that before my very eyes and without much effort my dream is, sort of, becoming true. I am modeling, and even if it's free and for small project that none professionals often take part in, and that even if I'll have a modlesmayhem account I won't find a real job in this because of me living in the country I live.

But I am still doing something, something that makes me look at a photo and makes me happy I am in this, I am modeling and making myself look the way I do, the way I want.

It is as if I am actually following "The Alchemist" after I read it.

I don't know how to describe it, but it simply makes me happy.

And I hope maybe, just maybe, when I'll go study fashion in Berlin as I plan, I will meet lots of people and get exposed, and then I could do what I am best at: being myself, and expressing myself and my visual beliefs  with makeup, clothing and my body.

I have no idea what will give me the highest pleasure out of the entire hobbies I have, but I a hoping that modeling would be it.

+ Nebel Violet +

Celebrations!

Here are some pics from yesterday's night celebrating my birthday with Boris and our best friend Avichai and his friend Amir.
It was a lot of fun, we first went to the cinema to see a film called "The Angles Share" a scottish drama/comedy movie, really nice film which meant a lot to me so I gladly recommend it [btw turns out scottish dialect has fucking no resemblance to english whatsoever], afterwards we went to eat a nice burger and went to an 80's party when I met a few more friends that I missed so much!

 This was my outfit for the night. I extra love mesh shirts lately. To think I would ever wear something not tight and flowy... You can also have a glimpse at our new and still a bit messy apartmeny

 For some reason, Boris and I tend to look like pf different nationalities sometimes. AKA, different nationalities that have nothing to do with our own. Crazy Latino/ Jack Sparrow + Some Japanese geisha anyone?  

Gypsies anyone?

Ha, in fact Boris does have Gypsy roots in him. That will always remain cool.

It was so much fun until i realized that I'm dancing to Mondlicht by Xmal Deutschland and about to vomit. And so we went home XD

Their singer is more inspirational to me than Siouxsie!

+ Nebel Violet +

Happy 21st Unbirthday to me!

Finally we finished moving,
And finally I can rest!
Today's gonna be lots of fun, and I'll upload pictures afterwards.

Yay me!!